Wrap Up Your Year and Dive Into 2025, Without Missing a Beat

As the year draws to a close, it’s time for reflection and preparation. Your Spotify Wrapped is here, your team is winding down for family time, and holiday treats are filling the breakroom. The front office walls are brimming with holiday cards, while your mind is set on a ski trip to Breckenridge, CO, or simply savoring a warm coffee by the lodge fire.

But before you settle into holiday mode, there’s still work to be done. From notifying patients about their six-month liner check-ups to reminding some patients to pick up their new Sockets and sending heartfelt thanks to your amazing referral sources—not to mention tackling your holiday shopping list—it’s easy to feel overwhelmed.

We’re here to help streamline your holiday season and make year-end marketing preparation a breeze. Let’s dive into resources and strategies to support your clinic as you wrap up 2024 and plan for 2025.

2025 Marketing Guide Resources:

Marketing Kit:

Marketing Kit – Prosthetics: Work with your preferred prosthetics manufacturing vendor to set-up a co-marketing portal, an online library makes it easy to access high-resolution images, videos, and posters 24/7 to beautify your clinic in the office and online!

2024 Marketing Resources:

Co-Branding: Print your co-branding marketing material using our custom print portal, or work with your local product vendor to create custom co-marketing material, which works for both players.

Marketing Audit: Let your marketing experts analyze your digital presence to maximize your outreach. Contact Frances Thorpe for assistance with auditing your platforms, website, and current marketing activities.

Marketing Strategy for the Local Practice: This is an informative look at how to obtain more referral sources with limited resources.

Top Referral Marketing Resources:

When entering the competitive landscape of prosthetic care, referral marketing is a critical strategy for expanding your patient base. Referral marketing leverages the trust and relationships between patients and their healthcare providers, enabling you to build a network of referring physicians, hospitals, and other medical professionals who can direct patients to your clinic.

Below are examples of reasonable and actionable goals to increase market share and expand your referral sources.

// Increase Patient Volume - Attract a higher number of patients through consistent and reliable referrals.

// Strengthen Professional Relationships - Build and maintain strong mutually beneficial relationships with healthcare providers.

// Enhance your Clinic’s Reputation - Position your clinic as a leading provider of prosthetic care in the medical community.

// Streamline Referral Processes - Develop efficient systems to make patient referrals seamless and straightforward for healthcare providers.

Referral Marketing Resources:

>> Orthopedic Surgeons

>> Vascular Surgeons

>> Primary Care Physicians (PCPs)

>> Physical Therapists

>> Rehabilitation Medicine Specialists

>> Hospitals and Rehabilitation Centers

>> Oncologists

How to reach out to them:

// Use the VGM data information your team has available to you to create a Narrow, Deep, and Controlled communication plan.

Best Options:

>> Holiday emails to referral sources and patients: Use a CRM platform like Salesforce, Pipedrive, or Hubspot to track patient information, visits, and communications. Grammarly is your best bet to grammar check your communications before hitting send. Check this email template examples out: https://www.wordstream.com/blog/ws/2022/12/01/holiday-email-templates

>> Holiday cards from the team: Make a Christmas, Holiday, or New Year card to Referral Resources and Patients. Vistaprint offers holiday discounts and quick shipping, you can even add your company logo to the card.

>> Gift baskets: Make your favorite medical team overjoyed with a wine basket from Wine Country Gift Baskets or a new Stanley Holiday Mug Set.

Top Webpage Analytics Resources:

Let’s cut to the chase… these are our top sources to support our ad creation and are consistently used by top-performing public companies like Amazon, Google, and Pfizer.

// AnswerThePublic: This tool listens into autocomplete data from search engines like Google then quickly cranks out every useful phrase and question people are asking around your keyword.

// SEMRush: Does your team want to learn how many users hit your website homepages and your local competitor’s webpages? This tool will tell you what keywords are driving users to the site, search engine optimization (SEO), and content marketing support. (Our marketing team’s favorite too!)

// Google: Track your webpage’s performance and metrics with Google, the O.G. of website marketing.

Top Social Media Planning Sites:

Unfortunately, social media is one of the most tedious projects your team players can grasp, yet it’s the most impactful if done well. With the right tools, you can appropriately plan out social media posts and ads that will drive more patients and referral sources right to your front door. Using planning tools to schedule, caption, and track social media can provide the best overview of what posts will best perform when you put a few dollars behind them in Meta Business Suite or LinkedIn.

Our vetted and preferred social media and ad planning platforms are listed below. (These are vetted by our expert marketing team). Deep dive into this blog post from Buffer for more options.

>> Buffer: New systems like Buffer have AI features to help rephrase, shorten, or expand social post captions, just don’t forget to review the content before you hit schedule… Oh, and it’s the lowest price per month out of the three listed here.

>> SproutSocial: Continuously awarded one of the most effective social planning, response, and analytics tooling platforms available. (Our team’s preferred planning platform.)

>> HootSuite: This is one of the best “all-in” social media platforms to plan and analyze the results of each post. Here’s a holiday bonus, they offer a free (no strings attached) customizable social media calendar through Google Sheets, take a look. 

Social Media Ads Support:

// LinkedIn, Facebook, and Instagram Ads Support:

>> Start your journey to an improved relationship with medical professionals and medical resources in your area, utilizing LinkedIn advertising. Make sure that when your sales team walks into the oncologist or vascular surgeon’s office, they know your brand before your rep says hello. See the below for suggestions:

              Start your LinkedIn Ads Campaign

              Types of Ads You Can Make

>> Stand-up Ads in Meta Business Suite for Facebook and Instagram, use these links below to get started:

              Create an Ads Account

              Stand-Up Ads in Facebook and Instagram

              Troubleshooting Articles on Facebook and Instagram Ads

Alright, so you now have all your t’s crossed and your i’s dotted let’s Spotify wrap this up, you have a new list of ways to reach referral resources, a social media calendar planner, a few choices for posting social media, ways to create ads for social media, some website improvement tools, and your favorite Marketing resources. What else could you want this holiday season?

Bonus: Team Holiday Gift Guide:

For your team members who go above and beyond the call of duty. See the list of options below:

>> Harry & David

>> Amazon

>> Target

Marketing and Communications Manager: Frances Thorpe

The Ides of March

Short, sweet, and savory:

Today, like most days was spent waking up to the Sun, greeting the early morning with yoga, scrolling through emails, driving to the gym, meeting a friend for dinner, catching up on self-care appointments, and making time to call family. While I find joy in these small moments of connection and solitude, I also am faced with the reality that without change, and building new bridges, life will become mundane. So tonight we are trying something new. We are actually going to watch a movie with meaning, we are going to stay present in the narrative and understand the characters for who they are.

Now, I am busy. Don’t roll your eyes. I know, we are all busy. But, spending time on television is not a habitual act of mine. In fact, it’s not something I do often anymore. For that, I am grateful.

However, tonight we are settling in with a hot cup of lemon tea, our comfiest blanket, and our favorite salad from Greenleaf.

The scene is set, tea in hand and remote ready to scroll through the options. So what is the pick of the evening? Will it be a comedy? Are we feeling dreamy and escapism or are we rooting ourselves in steadfast reality, grounding our soul to the harsh Hollywood version of today’s world? Scrolling, flipping, switching between options, we choose reality, that sweet sensation of feeling present and focused at the moment.

I chose the Ides of March.

Originally known as the 15th day of March in the Roman Empire, and the day to settle all debts. In Hollywood’s eyes, it’s a political flick resonating with the 2000’s political arena. Pulling in wide-eyed seeming Ryan Gosling, political expert George Clooney, young and restless Evan Rachel Wood, and intellectual stand-outs like Paul Giamatti and Philip Seymour Hoffman.

Gosling runs Clooney’s political campaign for president, crafting perfect campaign speeches over-flowing with jokes that highlight public relatability and tossing forth ideas that one-up the competition on every backhanded move.

While Gosling believes Clooney is the only electable presidential candidate, he is naïve in his beliefs. He is going against political opponents with marketing experience decades beyond his own, only to find his opponents have outwitted his state by state, leaving him in the shadow of his own defeat. While he uses white papers and political poetry to master perfected purposeful prose, he loses himself to the game, grasping for a breath of air when there is non to be had. Stuck between pulling for his white knight Clooney to capture Giamatti’s queen.

A Poem for the Piece:

Perpetuating political Reign

Realigning morals against Virtue

Vultures preying on the Innocent

Incumbents inoculating wide-eyed Does

Donning animals they don’t Represent

Residing on pedestals with false Purpose

Perfect Pictures

Popular opinions Squashed

Semi-imperfect people in Training

Terrific tendencies to truthfully Share

Supportive tangents like this Poem

Presidential candidates founded on Fortitude

While the poem was fun, we are not done. To wrap the tale, all I will share is that scandal and corruption are the basic necessities for any political proposition. While Gosling attempts to defend the government and political truth with honor, he fails to realize that he is the only one playing this game. He is just too late to play his hand by the time the dealer calls the bets, leaving him high and dry, without luck, and overplayed. It’s sad to think that politics is truly a game of all games like this. While we see it as leading change and future generational prosperity, in reality, it is nothing more than one person trying to outsmart the other, a game of intellect and wit. How can you stay one step ahead? But that’s life baby, just let it roll.

Choice

Are we free to determine our own fate or are we fated by predetermined decisions and actions?

Are we able to make a free choice unbeholden to our previous thoughts, actions, and optional paths, or are we stuck on a preset route made-up by our own personal histories?

Can we choose to go to Pilates because we have the freedom to reach that destination without interpersonal decisions weighing on our conscience?

Or are we determined to visit a pilates studio because we tried it in college, the friends we’ve chosen visit the same studio too, the social influences we listen to tell us it’s the new and trending thing to do, or is it because we purposefully chose to live next to a studio with a coastal view?

When is the moment that we acknowledge that we can be present in our daily lives and make meaningful choices that will shape our lives for a better future when we are unable to know what lies ahead of us?

Well if you haven’t figured it out already I’m talking to you about the concept of Free Will vs Determinism. Yup, that’s right the idea that we either (in an ideal world of black and white, with no grey area in between) can freely choose each next step with no hindering influences or we are already determined on our path by our previous actions, leaving us ultimately with no real choices.

Now you may be diving into your mind, think lightly - this concept shouldn’t give you too much grief, to ask yourself “What moments have I already experienced in my life, the past year, or even today that have gotten me here”? Think about it, did you give yourself time to make lunch before work? If not, now you must pick something up at the local deli or sandi shop, unless you “choose” to abstain out of spite or hunger. So really was that a choice or a pre-determined path, based on the fact that you didn’t prepare yourself for the future?

But, don’t go down the rabbit hole. There is more than one way to peak through this looking glass…

Let’s say you didn’t pack lunch and are starving. It’s 12 o’clock on the dot and you can’t wait to start nibbling on that Monday special avo, turkey club the shop downstairs prepares just perfectly. You look up and your co-worker is walking toward you. Before you can say anything, they ask to go to lunch at the new fusion cuisine spot down the street. PAUSE! Take a second and think. You ultimately have multiple routes you can take. One, you can go get that sandwich you’ve been drooling over. Two, you can go to lunch and try something new, maybe have a conversation about the new exhibit at MOMA in NY and how Williamsburg isn’t as trendy as it was in 2016, or run into your middle school best friend at the restaurant. Three, petition your immaturity by resisting monetary temptation and resist the satisfaction of a full belly and beating heart.

So the argument stands, do you have free will or are you determined by your previous set of actions?

I’d argue that being present in your life gives you the freedom to choose your path. Being able to observe your daily thoughts, behaviors, conversations, actions, and patterns gives you the freedom to choose your next whimsical adventure. It gives you the ability to take charge in your life, “seize the day” as they say (or carpe diem, if you please).

Now let’s pause again. Think through your choices. What are the repercussions of your actions? What will happen if you choose to eat the sandwich; will you be too full for the delicious leftovers from Reunion Kitchen waiting for you in the fridge at home? What happens if you go to the restaurant; will you decide you miss city life and immediately apply to every big city on the east coast? What happens if you miss lunch (PLEASE tell me you didn’t take this option if you thought about it drink some water and try again)? Well, if you took health in high school, you should know that you need to eat protein, fats, and carbs to keep that little body and big brain functioning at peak capacity. Don’t be a fool, fuel yourself and be great. Drastic and potentially dramatic, I know, but these little decisions and hypothetical situations are just considerations of what may occur when you take choice into account. It’s all about being present.

Let the opportunities in your life flow through to your front doorstep. Let your future align with your thoughts and actions. The more presence you give yourself, the more choices you will see in front of you. The more choices you allow yourself, the more freedom you have for your next adventure. So go on the adventure of a lifetime and build your dream, make sure you keep your honor and your diginity. You can’t take your house to the grave but you can keep your promises.

Playtime

Time carries on and yet we are still living, breathing, talking, and conversing with one another.

Thanksgiving felt different this year. Two years ago we couldn’t come together to meet. There were no hugs, no debates on roasted potatoes versus creamy mashed potatoes, no debate between canned whipped cream and cinnamon-flavored hand-whipped cream dolloped atop a slice of pumpkin pie, and no reason to feel that each moment needs to look like and live on a Hallmark card.

In all honesty, the entire day was quite beautiful, moving, and in one word satisfying. We took our time cooking, with no need to rush through preparing food for others or strategize oven prep against personal grooming to impress relatives. No, it was an honest holiday, filled with real laughter and perfectly shaped, crisped, flaked, oiled, spiced, scrumptious potatoes.

It was a group effort, with each team member playing their role in the project. Mum and my sister baked the traditional turkey-imprinted sugar cookies the day before. The morning of, I loaded my part-time puppy (we love Brady) into the second row of my reliable, sturdy, and ready-for-a-much-needed wash after one too many summer adventures, Santa Fe. We love another white crossover vehicle plopped in the middle of Orange County, don’t we? I think we would love it more if it was an EV, but it’ll do for now … it’ll do for now. Brady, what can I say other than he is an absolute angel of a puppy? He loved the intense and grueling journey of the all of one and one-half miles we traveled. He jumped out and looked at me as if to say “What now? Let’s go!”. We strolled to the front door, me with bag, gear, and celery in hand to support the stuffing we would be mixing in about 5 hours. Mum knows I’m there already and opens the door. “Shhh, everyone is still asleep,” she says. While I have been up since 5:30 am, some things never change, and I am still shocked. “Alright,” I say, “time to change that.”

“GOOD MORNING!”

I loudly share as I open my sister’s door. I turn to move down the hall toward my sweet brother’s room. As I open the door I can hear him snoring, I greet him kindly, he doesn’t fair as well with a loud, and in all honesty, rude awakening as my sister does. Dad walks by my brother’s room while we are chatting about how his week went at school. “Good,” I think, “I won’t have to wake the beast.”

They’re all awake now, brilliant, my plan worked. The sooner everyone is up, the sooner we can start the art projects. This turkey cookie decorating may seem simple, juvenile, and superfluous and in all honestly, it’s the easiest cookie recipe with the most rudimentary frosting dye for exciting color options; BUT it is my mum’s favorite part of the day and apparently mine as well. This is something that my dad’s mother (Grandmother, Oman, Pat, and Patricia, these were some of her nicknames and to me she was probably the smartest woman I ever knew) started when we used to visit El Paso, Texas for the holiday. In fact, mum and I found a photo of the two of us painting turkey cookies in my Grandmother’s kitchen a little while ago. It warmed my heart like a fresh slice of pumpkin pie.

Knowing that if I don’t start the icing mixture now we will probably be behind schedule for food preparations soon, so I get to work. As I said, this is as simple as can be. The frosting is sifted powdered sugar, mixed with orange juice. Just be careful with the juice, it takes over the mix quite fast and only needs to be dripped, then heavily beaten into the mixture to meet the right consistency.

Pulling out the food coloring mum and I decided to stick to primary and secondary colors, then, add pink, brown, and non-colored icing last, and now we’re ready for turkey painting. After corralling the teenagers we can finally start. I deep dive and start with the hard template: pulling only Thanksgiving colors like red, yellow, orange, and brown to make a realistic (this is a sugar cookie realism is impossible, yet let’s attempt it anyway) turkey. Now that that’s done, I can move to the fun patterns like marbling and crosshatching with color combinations like pink and purple, blue and green, and yellow and red. Before I know it I’m five decorated turkeys in and my sister is breathing down my neck. I reach for the sixth cookie and I get the sense that it won’t be possible when my sister says: “Umm, no I don’t think so. There is no way you are touching another paintbrush until mom and Wills get to play.” I fight back with, “Well you if you want to decorate you’re going to have to speed it up, or there won’t be any left.” She’s in the driver's seat with this one and I am limited by my reach against her athletic stature. I have no choice in this fight. I sit back and cross my arms in a huff and wait until mum and Wills come to play. She knows I love this stuff. I watch Brady and my parent’s dog Barkeley play in the backyard.

Suddenly, I am reminded of the child I really am.

I realize that in all reality I am actually now 28 years old, but when it comes to my family relationships, has the dynamic ever really changed? Probably a minuscule amount compared to the temperature change for Thanksgiving weekend in Southern California, over the past 28 years.

Truthfully, I am no more than five years old at that moment. My sister, who I believe is perpetually stuck at 4 years old due to her obsession with Pixar movies and giggling with her friends, reminded me that I am still a child and behave like one when I don’t get my way. It’s funny because I believe that she is the only one who can really put me in this mindset. When you grow up with someone you can never really ignore your child-self.

Eventually, she let me back into the blank canvas cookie box after mum and Wills had a go at art class. The rest of the day was a typical Thorpe Thanksgiving and really the opposite of everyone else’s version of smooth sailing. We probably argued for about 5 hours and continued into dessert, finishing off with a slice of pumpkin pie while we energetically crowded over the new board game my sister sourced and dominated.

Our love language is the truth, arguing, raw logical reasoning, and undying loyal love. There is really no other way I’d rather live, or we would be honestly bored.

I gathered Brady and my bag and head back to the house. We make a cup of tea and cuddle on the living room couch browsing Netflix. In search of the next documentary we land on Jonah Hill’s newest contribution to the film academy’s library of black and white emotional biographies’, ‘Stutz’. It’s not what I expected.

I appreciate Jonah Hill in his many amazing comedic roles. However, here, in the opening movie Hill made me feel uncomfortable and as if he was challenging his therapist, almost as if the documentary was a way to reveal more about how Hill has overcome his own trauma rather than help others through theirs. The film claims and offers a biographical narrative of Hill’s therapist Stutz as well as examples and practices Stutz has been using for years to help his patients. Rather than offer the emotional empathy that you hope to see in the film, Hill seems to expose Stutz’s past and personal trauma seriously making this more about Hill attempting a power play against his therapist in a fighting ring, rather than a way to help other people learn how to overcome their trauma.

Ignoring the confusion of the film’s composition, Stutz talks about someone’s shadow and explains that your shadow is who you are at your core and what is holding you back from improving your circumstances.

“The Shadow is an archetype—a universal motif or image built into all human beings. You can no more get rid of this inner Shadow than you can avoid casting an outer shadow when you’re in sunlight.”

If you don’t separate and nurture your shadow self, you will forever be attempting to live the unachievable. To nurture your shadow-self Stutz asks that you talk to the “sum total of the weakest, most flawed, inferior, or even disgusting parts of yourself”, i.e. your shadow.

As I watched this I thought back to myself trying to grab that next cookie and my sister tearing the box away from me. I saw myself and understood where I needed to create a conversation. I saw the teenager who so desperately wanted praise and acceptance from others and who tried her best in everything, attempting to be the perfect blonde girl everyone would want to know and love. But that was never going to happen, who is actually perfect? I saw the girl who played 3 sports, ran 7 clubs, took all AP classes, and was mostly overweight through high school. I saw the girl who tried to people-please in order to be accepted and told her that she is actually perfect on her own. She is exactly who she needs to be and can still change to be better, to learn more, to be kinder, and still can love herself, without needing acceptance from others. Because in fact, I am no longer just that individual, I am someone who has learned from quite a few life-changing experiences, each of which came with its own lesson. I am a 28-year-old woman working for a company that cares about its community and their health, someone who independently supports and loves herself, someone who enjoys time with her beautiful friends, and someone who makes each day count. Our time is limited here so why waste it, why waste your precious time aiming to be something you’re not, just play.

So now, I ask you the reader who is your shadow? Maybe you don’t have one - in that case congratulations, you are too cool for school. If you do, please use this tool and this reference to learn how to improve and navigate through your conscience.

While you do, I’m going to head to bed and dream about the patterns I’ll be making for turkey decorating art class next year.

Until next time.

- Frankie

Keep Time

How do you keep time?

Now you may think this may be related to a watch or tech device. Really a rant about our current drive towards technological expansion. Given the recent development of the ‘Metaverse’, thanks to a walking robot boosted by companies that we buy into every day. The society that chooses to live off of its population. It has only grown to proportions that we are unprepared to naturally support.

It is to some extent, related. We live through technology. We use it to monitor our communication with friends, family, co-workers, local businesses. Not to mention it’s technically (no pun intended) a computer. You walk with a handheld computer, which accesses your daily habits and your every waking moment.

Consider this: (event - mobile app)

• sleep - health

• morning meditation - insta

• emails - outlook

• daily schedule - calendar

• new - la times

• driving - wayz

• emails - outlook

• convos - slack

• recording - excel

• writing - atlassian

• meeting - zoom

• lunch - catering

• (email through meeting repeat)

• call - phone

• driving - wayz

• yoga - ra yoga

• homework - google drive

• prep for sleep - alarm

Now let’s not forget about the other apps we use: social media, camera, kindle, exercise trackers, and recipe books.

How many of these scenarios are a part of your daily routine?

What do you want to remove?

How did we ever manage with just a watch? We record our every moment using a computer that gives us a way to increase our contribution and value to society. Where can you see yourself giving yourself more time? Although time is limited, we can give ourselves incredible freedom through disciplined time management. Get yourself a calendar, a journal, a friend to talk with, just find something to track the daily habits that build you over time. Make yourself accountable and commit to your development. You are the only person that can improve your situation because you are the only one having your singular experience.

Give yourself more time to accomplish your goals through management.

Fate is Inaction, Fear is Unpredictable

Recent conversations have created a moment of reflection on the surroundings we face and the internal struggles we must combat. In response, this is an idea on conquering fear; in the words someone who believes life will be filled with ups and downs, both of which create your unique and special self.

fear

It haunts you like a dark spirit, jumping out at you when you least expect it. You may experience fear more often than others. Turning in and searching for a way out, a space deep and engulfing. A dark hole swallowing you whole. completely debilitating, it takes you as a prisoner. 

You may be able to escape. You may be able to take your sword from its leather partner, both destined to accompany their triumphant leader in greatness, strike down your enemy with a power stronger than you had ever expected to exert. What will you discover about yourself? What will you find at the end of your life? A missed opportunity based on a previous negative experience or an unproven idea of the unknown, inhibiting your urge to fly. Or? Will it be the might to fight and experience possible failure, only to learn from it? Will it make you more present and prepared to use your soul's strength, to take a step and make your dreams a reality. 

It's time to turn toward yourself and find a way to make what you want happen. make it happen, captain. 

Don’t let life pass by you like a train speeding through the bountiful countryside, amongst spring flowers, under the young sun and light blue sky absent of clouds. Turn your fated tracks into your own build of of industry, diminish your fear and enter into the unknown of a new experience, shaping the future you’re creating. The idea that we must discipline ourselves rather than return to our old habits out of comfort (although they may not serve us in this new year of life) can be a difficult concept to grasp. Creating a structure will keep you focused and prepared to withstand what comes your way.

You are the determiner of your future.

Your fear of heights should never stop you from reaching, take the plunge. Pull on your boots, hike up the hill and climb the mountain, make your way to the peak and discover something new. What will you find at the top? Turn a fear into an experience you’ll never forget. 

Have the conversation you know you need to have. Understanding comes from a place of connection and communication, never truly achievable. You can only truly attempt to understand another person's experience and step into their shoes. But, you can still listen and sympathize. Don’t try to focus on what you will say in response, instead wait and listen. Listen to their body, mind, heart and words; hear what they are telling you. What will come after this is a connection you will be able to grow and flourish or a relationship, which will you learn from and propel you past your boundaries. 

Move into the unknown, take it on warts and all, until you can polish to perfection. Make a home for yourself in a city you will love and know that your home will never leave you. You are your own home, you make your life what you want it to be and you have the power to live in the city you know will help build you to the person you want to become. 

Take the leap you know is within your path and challenge yourself to become the destined leader of your own future.

Conquer what scares you, disregard what negates you, learn how to become your own support and approach the unknown with arms wide open. 

on another note:

this was one of my favorite songs as a kid, please roast me as you’d like kind comrade.

•with arms wide open•••creed•

May 20, 2020

It’s been almost a year, time really flies when you’re focused I guess.

Today we are talking about STRESS. 

Simply put, stress is a fight or flight response to events in our lives we see as challenges. Maybe we are unsure of how to progress through these challenges, take them on with a sword in one hand and a shield in the other, or watch our stress float away on a delicate puffy cloud, as we lay in a yellow and white daisy flowered field of our own confidence. 

Stress does funny things to people. In reality, it motivates people in one direction or another, pushing us to rise to our feet or run away from our fears. Being consistently stressed can lead to burnout, depression, and loss of confidence. It can diminish and deplete you like a deflated balloon, sunken into an aged oak tree. Not feeling stress is blissful but may mean that, as I experienced at one point, there may not be enough challenges driving you forward. If you can feel stress, see a path through, find how you can develop, learn and grow, you have really learned how stress is nothing more than a feeling, which will pass.

Your reactions to challenges you face and how you treat those that help you through will define you, not the feelings that flow through your conscience. 

Stress has become easier to find over the past year. We have all been through personal and social trials and tribulations, seeing ourselves change so quickly. To be frank, the pandemic is something we have all had to work through, some have lost lives, some have lost jobs, some have lost relationships; what motivated us to keep going? 

When the Black Lives Matter movement started last year, I felt so emotionally drained and frustrated, angered and deeply saddened by the lack of support I felt from those who are trained to protect people, instead they choose violence when they should have used their words. When people began to protest I watched, in pain, in solidarity with the idea for social justice reform, I am an ally and support how I can. I am sure many others have felt this pain. 

When we began to work from home, we imagined a more relaxed work environment with more pressure to perform. Top half ready and bottom half relaxed (think dress shirt and sweats). Work became more intense, management felt out of control, stressed they couldn’t watch production with a ‘hands-on’ approach. People were huddled into a work environment driven by fear of loss, causing them to work longer hours with less personal interaction; in short we’re burnt out.

Being so close to some and simultaneously separated from others created boundaries we were unaware of holding in our relationships. We missed our friends, reached out to those we hadn’t spoken with in a while, tried to create connections, we were lonely. We found out who cared and who didn’t, who people really were when they weren’t living for the camera. We found out who found motivation on their own and who belittle others for whatever reason they believed they should. People have really shown their true colors.

Where have you seen yourself, where has your stress manifested and appeared to motivate or derail you?

What have you been able to change and develop? Where have you let go? How have you accepted others' faults that cause you anxiety? How have you made stress into a small ball of fluff that can comfort you or make you itch? 

Our reactions to stress show what type of people we really are, what our previous experiences have taught us and how we can learn to cope. Some people internalize their stress, it may look like someone who is being extra quiet while the rest of the room is boasting with energy. Internalized stress can build and build and may even implode for a person, leaving them overcome with a flood of repressed emotions. Why do we demonize stress, it’s a driver? We even rationalize separation from others in order to manage our own person. But really, what will this do? It will cause us more pain and push us from our relationships, and enjoyable life experiences. Some internalize, pain and then eventually project into other facets of their life leaving them stranded before they know what they’ve done. 

So how do you show stress, do you show stress? Personally, I feel stress from so many parts of my life, and past experiences, some more scarring than others. These experiences taught me about who I was, what I would become; finding how to work through poisonous relationships, both friendly and romantic, understanding who is on your team, knowing that the world is actually quite beautiful and a gift to those who know how to interpret its messages, and teaching me to understand that time heals all wounds, no matter how painful. 

Now, I learn to communicate, I learn to listen to others when they speak and my surroundings, and I learn to speak carefully, treading lightly -- selectively trusting. I learn this everyday. Trying to destress without addressing the problem directly led me to run around the thoughts in my head constantly, and eventually caused me to physically run from my problems.

Change is inevitable, it was time to change my habits and change the thought process, time to ADDRESS THE STRESS. 

All the hobbies I took up to distract myself have now become a fun time away while never distracting from the problem, some of them lead me to focus on the problem and source a logical solution with little effort. Those hobbies: writing my revelations, cooking delectable dinners and treats for loved ones, stretching for focus and breath, finding friends to meet and laugh with, sweating the hard stuff away, searching for a new favorite hideaway, and painting for deep focus, all lead me to develop and become a more complete person. They did not take away the stress. Focusing on the root of my issues and finding how I internalized the pain, running to escape and pushing away the people I loved until I could no longer be alone, made me understand I can’t run away from my stress. It will only sit with me and grow. I had to face it head on and share my troubles. People don’t know what you’re thinking, so share your story, cry, laugh, and learn to love your change and progression.

July 19, 2020

How about we play a little game..

Truth or dare?

Dare.

ok… I dare you to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.

Consider this your sworn testimony to life.

Now I don’t mean tell the truth about some things and allude to the truth or only share certain parts, that won’t hurt the person you’re talking to. I don’t mean sharing a story about someone in hopes that the receiver of your narrative will spit out their truthful lives back to you. This doesn’t mean you need to live a falsehood to claim what you do, speak, and believe is honest. I mean to tell the truth. If it hurts or harms the people around you, you may 1) not be an honest person, 2) you may need to rethink some of your actions, 3) you may need some higher form of guidance, and 4) you may just be something considered a little too honest (honestly, they’ll thank you in the end for it).

Why would you want to live with someone who you have to hide things from, have to make up stories to cover up your reality? Sounds like a lot of work huh? Well would you? I wouldn’t. So, if you aren’t honest, could you live with yourself?

Make honesty rewarding. Think of it as trick or treating for Halloween candy or presents from Santa. For every point of interaction and option to participate in life honestly, consider that a new house you visit or a present under the twinkling Christmas tree. When you choose your path of honesty you get a treat. Deciding to hide that honesty or participate in an activity considered as non-truthful, you better believe you’ll eventually get a piece of coal in your stocking.

Karma, Christianity, Astrology, Mormonism, or even for that matter Scientology; all practice a system of positive rewards and negative deterrents, for certain actions you take in life. Think about it, life is a series of events and opportunities, small decisions you make on a minute to minute basis. Each one related to the previous and just as important as the next one; each one effects future circumstances and windows towards your destiny.

Let’s put this into play. Think of social media and how you perceive certain “users” or account figureheads (that’s right, some of those accounts have 10 or more people working on them, it takes a village to build an image) and even how those blue check marks, light up a profile just a little bit more. Do you really think these celebrities, accounts, and influencers are being their most honest selves? You think that those sugar bear hair gummies are actually a ‘God-send’? The real ‘God-send’: the weave and clip-ins from the hair factories in India, mixed with the celebrity hair stylists (with 10+ years of experience), and just a dash - oops - ok a HUGE splash of photoshop. There you go, the perfect ad campaign at the fingertips of every consumer with access to the internet. Honestly, I’d rather not watch celebrities earn millions for sharing their tips and tricks to a perfect mane. This isn’t to say every celebrity and influencer shares only falsehoods with the public, there are quite a few that have been brave enough to expose their lives truthfully, with the purpose of being vulnerable.

Practicing honesty will allow you to see yourself for who you really are, it will let you see others as they really are as well. Give it a try and let me know if you have feedback; honestly, I’d love to hear it.

Also here’s a link to this spot in Italy I’ve been thinking about all week.

July 5, 2020

Do I want chocolate or vanilla?

*Stares at chocolate labeled frozen yogurt dispenser

Hmm, when was the last time I had Golden Spoon’s delectable chocolate delights. I think it was about a year ago. Wow, where was that? Oh, ya, that was so much fun hanging out with her, I should text her. I wonder what she’s doing now. Wait, did I have chocolate or chocolate malt. Oooo I miss the afternoons after soccer practice, still buzzing from finally making a goal during a scrimmage, refueling with sugar to shake off the salty feeling of sweat drying on my naked shins. Only, 10 minutes before did I finally rip off those dreaded shin guards.

Wait, focus. What about vanilla? You always get chocolate and then you have two bites and it’s too rich. You know you really just want a small vanilla swirl with snowcaps to top it off. Mum always gets vanilla and I always want the smallest taste, just to remember how sweet simplicity melts so lightly onto my tongue. Reminding me of sick days spent away from school. I cuddled in bed with a book, dreaded strep throat medicine sitting and waiting to quickly be engulfed and the large bowl of vanilla bean ice cream watching patiently, awaiting for me do dive into it: the reward.

Frankie… it’s just ice cream. Pick one, you can get a different flavor next time.

What if Golden Spoon closes and there is no next time?

Well then you find a new sweet spot to indulge at.

This is how my mind works, WITH EVERY DECISION. However simple they may be, I complicate them to the fullest extent and end up contemplating my life existence. If I eat this today then I won’t be able to eat that tomorrow. Or, if I read this book then I won’t have time to go on a run. If I pursue this career, I won’t be able to do something else in the future. It becomes a strenuous and high-anxiety driven process for almost everything. What if decisions weren’t as hard as they seemed and the big ones could be broken down into smaller ones.

If I follow this path in my life, this will happen. Actually, that’s not true; we can’t predict what is going to happen in the future. (Please refer to the link which puts “free will” into perspective) Now this isn’t to say that life is a series of random events. I will say that a series of small decisions, made by the same mindset, will create a lifeline directly related to the moral compass of that same individual’s mindset. It’s the same idea as being mindful, considering possibilities as they fall in front of you. Looking at every opportunity as a new life path. Think of how one decision can effect your life in the next ten years, too difficult and unrealistic? Think again. What about the city you live in? The relationships you choose to make, keep, and sadly leave behind. The institutions you dedicate your time too. Do you support the people you surround yourself with? Or do you question them?

A Contemporary Introduction to Free Will - Kane

If every decision you made could effect the rest of your life how would you proceed?

Chocolate or Vanilla?

Also, I would like to thank a friend for supporting my writing in this space. For that I am also attaching this blueberry bread pudding recipe - it’s scrumptious.

Blueberry Pull-Apart Bread

May 15, 2020

First off, it’s been a wild week. Even though we are still on lock down I have had too many professional, educational, personal, and spiritual commitments to count. Nothing worry-some, each has just taken so much time to attend to that I missed writing here by two days. The biggest commitment this week has been interactions with others (obviously socially distancing) and maintaining relationships.

It’s funny looking back to last weeks post discussing feelings. A few friends reached out to me asking about the feelings wheel and how it works. I took the time to go back and edit the post to more thoroughly explain how the wheel works in paragraph seven. Taking the time to then discuss the feelings wheel with them let both of us have a deeper understanding of each others current emotional and mental state of being. It was a very intimate experience and I really enjoyed learning about them. These small, meaningful, interactions made me reflect on my relationships. Now I don’t just mean relationships with significant others, but all of the relationships in my life. This includes: old friends, new friends, family, lovers, mentors, social media connections, colleagues, and people who I have a cultivated connections with. ALL of these relationships have helped me become the person I am today. Some of them have helped me, some set me back, some have lasted for over twenty years, some of them just started, some of them have stopped and then restarted. Relationships can help determine so many possible pathways for us in life, why would anyone want to limit these possibilities when they seem so exciting and appear to show potential optimistic outcomes. How do we know which relationship is going to help us or hinder us when we engage in connection, we don’t! I am limited through my experiences because of time and resistance to applying myself in certain relationships; however I have learned so much from each of these personal bonds and would like to enlighten you through my experiences.

Let’s start with old friends. A couple of weeks ago I met up and social distanced with an old friend from high school, who I haven’t connected with for quite a while. We’ve seen each other twice since that initial visit. It was so wonderful swapping stories, catching up, and ultimately seeing how much we have both grown and learned from our past relationships. We met in middle school and had several classes together but didn’t really try to hang out or get to know one another until high school. I am so thankful for this person and genuinely appreciate her insight and opinions on so many aspects of life. She is a wonderful soul who cares about everyone in her life and is one of the few people I know who reaches out to people when she knows they need help. I always knew she was like this, but I took her caring nature for granted and expected this type of effort from most of the people I met in college. I wasn’t until the end of college that I figured out this kind of interpersonal dedication was rare and not something to anticipate from others. This is a relationship that I am rekindling and strengthening.

We had started talking about our previous relationships and how they’ve changed and formed us into how we see people now. I am someone who puts my all into the people around me; someone who wants to watch the people I love, grow into the best version of themselves they can become. This is the type of relationship I want to be apart of. Not a relationship where you treat each other like social competition, who can be the best and leave the other person behind.

This type of relationship doesn’t build one another up, it tears you both down inside, to where you loose sight of what’s really important: your love for one another. That’s all relationships really are: sharing different forms of love with one another; whether it be familial, friendly, or romantic. Showing people how much you care about them and telling them how important they are.

May 6, 2020

I feel lost this week. So let’s talk about feelings!

What defines a feeling? Merriam Webster defines feeling in two ways. The first is “ appreciative or responsive awareness or recognition”. The second is “an emotional state or reaction”.

Time to break it down. Yes I know we are not in second grade anymore and this seems a little ridiculous; trust me. When you are up to your neck in anxiety understanding why or how you entered that state of stress will help you leave it. So the first definition, means that you have to RECOGNIZE your state of being and become aware of it. This requires a measure of presence and emotional intelligence of the self, understanding what your body and mind (do not separate the two, they are dependent on one another). The second definition is the emotional state or a reaction to an action. For example, the boy threw his sisters baseball in the lake, his sister felt angry at her brother and sad the ball was gone.

I feel lost. This could mean that I actually feel lost, like I am stuck in the middle of the scorching Arizona desert with no water, food, gas for the car, or map to guide me. I’m still in quarantine so that’s not even a possibility for now. When I say I feel lost, I say this because I am stuck in my house and I am recognizing my lack of control in my day-to-day. Yes, I am taking classes in architecture and sociology, I am practicing yoga, eating a salad (maybe two a day), running on occasion, reading, drawing, and challenging my mental capacity. I still feel lost, I feel like I can’t continue my old routine, and have to change and adapt to a new one.

Change is something that I have always claimed to be a proponent of. Now that I am faced with CHANGE (that I feel the effects of, as well as the people around me, and quite frankly the entire world) I realize how humbling this experience is and how everyone is dealing with this CHANGE. I stopped running after injuring my ankle about a month ago, 7 miles into a run and I trip over a rock the size of my thumbnail. As soon as it happened I knew how bad it was, I’m a tough cookie - I don’t cry when I get hurt on the field. Swelling quickly and throbbing, my ankle was yelling at me, telling me you over did it; you pushed yourself a little too hard and now you’re going to have to take a break and recover. My preferred release outlet just evaporated but, for once I was going to listen to my body.

It’s been a month. Let a medical professional examine the join (just a bad sprain, yayyyy); I’ve been icing, stretching, and only walking on it when I want to. It feels so much better, and on May 1st I ran on it, with big thick nike tube socks on under some chunky Asics runners. It felt great, I practiced presence and breath work, holding my core and listening to my joints. That’s when I don’t feel lost, I feel present and focused.

Let’s use the Feelings Wheel to analyze the thought pattern of emotions we experience when present in situations. Start at the center of the wheel. Identify with the feeling labeled you most connect with at the present moment. Then span out to the next ring of options. Finally, speak with yourself, attempt to expand to the final ring of feeling labels and connect with the most pointed and specific “feeling” option. I am making a commitment to using the feelings wheel and practicing expressing my feelings rationally utilizing this tool. Looking at the wheel, lost is not an option to choose from. Moreover, I don’t think lost is an accurate depiction of my emotion; I think I am scared not sad and following my thought pattern I think helpless or insignificant is a more appropriate description. Woah, wait a minute, I am helpful and driven; I make dinner for everyone almost everyday and clean the house on the weekend. I don’t feel as helpful as hospital workers or grocery store employees, but I am still helping others how I can. Insignificant may be the most appropriate. That’s ok, feeling these EMOTIONS does not change who I am or create my actions; just recognizing these feelings allows me to understand what I need to do to help myself.

I am not sure if this can help you but a friend of mine showed it to me once and it has helped significantly during the q. Hopefully it can help you if you feel but can’t understand.

April 29, 2020

Oxford Dictionary defines gratitude as: “the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.”

Last night, after a traditional and almost daily family dinner (something my family has been in the practice of for years) I spent some solid quality time with my dad. We were able to just sit outside, comfortably observing the remaining sliver of light radiating from the sunset onto our spacious yet quaint backyard. We sat and watched the leaves lightly rustle between the trees, the air circulating around us, the smell of spring blowing past us. We talked about how grateful we are to look before us and see physical resemblance of peace; the world continues on its path whether we are happy, sad, mad, excited, frustrated, and even content. Our emotions have very little impact on our physical surroundings. Our actions however, can have a lasting and rippling affect, influencing all of our surroundings. We both agreed that we are so lucky, in the midst of this chaos, we can just sit and watch.

The events of the past few months I have learned that I really don’t have as much control as I believe I do, but I can control my actions. I don’t have control over the rise and fall of the economy, but I can choose to invest. I can’t control the availability of supplies I have access too, but I can control how I use what I have and try to choose an appropriate time to purchase what I need. I don’t have the ability to control my employers choices but I can show my appreciation for what they have given me and commit to doing what I can to help them. I don’t have a choice in who will be hurt by this virus, but I do have the option to try and protect those around me by being cautious of my own actions. I don’t have control over who stays in my life and who leaves, but I am able to practice gratitude and share how thankful I am for the people I do have. I am thankful for my health and the health of my loved ones. I am thankful for my employer, lululemon, and their never-ending support. I am thankful for my home and my bed. I am thankful for my mind and creativity. I am thankful for what I have because it shows me that’s all I really need.

I hope that you can find what you are grateful for too. If you would like to practice this but are not sure where to start I have attached a gratitude list link to help. Happy Wednesday!

Gratitude List

April 22, 2020

Progress in the Big Q…

Wake up, stare in the mirror, “today’s going to be a good day.”

Gather last nights tea cup and walk to the kitchen, fills the first giant glass of water.

Meander my way to the bathroom, shower and start another Wednesday in Quarantine life.

5 step skin care routine, brush hair, brush teeth, put some more lululemon on and dance my way back to a bright white desk.

Look through todays calendar for the daily check list, write out the plan, time for coffee. Back to the little black sketch book for a quick doodle. Upload to computer and add color and shadows.

That right there is the daily plan. In this time I have found that I have very little control of my life except for the actions that I take everyday. So productivity and progress are slow but results are quickly appearing. This daily routine has made it easy to find the little things I see and do so much more enjoyable. Cooking is becoming less about what is socially ok to eat and more about fueling my body so I can focus on projects and be as productive as possible. Veggies are one of my best friends, mushrooms, and fruits aren’t far behind. When you don’t feel rushed to be somewhere you get to actually experience the act of cooking and fill your dish with love. I’m eating more, feeling fuller and happier; instead of worrying about the nutrition labels I’ve been worrying about how many aspects of the rainbow can I fit into one bowl. If it looks like the refraction of sunlight through a clear pyramid like crystal, then I’m satisfied. At the same time the people I live with aren’t as into this as I am (we have been taking turns cooking for one another) so I’ve been making lots of vegetables (my main, and their side) along with some seriously good soul foods. If you’re looking for some good eats, heres a couple scrumptious starters to get those mouths salivating.

cheesy mushroom polenta

(Added some merlot to the mushrooms, extra flavorful. Made a side salad and seared some fillet cuts to round out the meal.)

chicken piccatta

(Pardon my french but dredge the s*** out of that chicken, also the more butter in the sauce the better. If its not thick enough add a little mixed flour with water before adding back the chicken.)

coconut chicken curry

(Put a lot more veggies in this than it called for, and added a few more spices; so, so good!)

I thought I was going to go stir crazy during this period but I’ve actually developed a very positive interpersonal relationship with my being. Q life has made me reflect on who I have, what I have, what I actually need, and what I can do. This sounds silly to me but I took the Meyers-Briggs personality test and found out I’m an Architect/Engineer, INTP. Honestly, I wasn’t that surprised but it made me feel a lot more confident about my career efforts towards architecture and sociology. These people are introverted, intuitive, thinking, and perceiving. They are extremely focused and only exist in about 2.5% of the population, one in 100 are females actually; a rarity. They, hahaha me/we, like to focus in depth on whatever we are working on and can bounce from project to project quite easily. This doesn’t mean we aren’t centered on what’s in front of us, it just means that when we are thinking of one project we are able to see the connections and relations to the next thing, we see the details within the big picture.

Time to go back to work, (throws on a Scuba Jacket and whips out Sketch-up on Chrome, “I’ve got this!”)

Happy Earth Day! Talk to you in a week!

july 15, 2019

So here’s the deal…

I started working in print and layout design in 2012. It’s been a long journey but I am working as a Brand Manager for an Engineering firm on Lido Isle and as an educator at lululemon athletica, South Coast Plaza.

Right now I am working to figure out my next career move. Please choose one of the following options:

a. Social Ecology Professor - masters at UCI (eventual doctorate and honestly could hang out with 20 year olds forever)

b. Masters in Achitechture and Planning (could go international y’all)

c. Law School for Law and Urban Planning (I just want to reorganize the world so there are more equal opportunities for everyone, you can’t help WHERE you are born into, but we can control the cities we build … ask me about the quilted planning theory)

d. Masters in Sociology and continue my growth at lululemon though people development!

d. I’m way too indecisive and would rather eat peanut butter and chocolate ice cream, cuddle with my dog, listen to music, and read about the astrology i believe in, but also totally challenge.

So that’s the story for today.

Go listen to my new playlist for the week july 15: https://spoti.fi/2XIDXoo